Maximum Ride: the First Child Protection Agency
by Deino1217
Summary: Max, FCPA First Child Protection Agency , Fang, Iggy--- Not so good. I suck at summarys, so i just... yeah. By Jay and Ali :D :D :D
1. Say What?

**A/N:** **I DO NOT OWN MAXIMUM RIDE. IF I DID, FANG WOULD BE **_**MINE**_**!! **** ~What about me???~ OH RIGHT!!! That's my co-writer Crimson-Wolf-of-Darkeness aka Jay ~teehee~**

Chapter 1

MPOV:

~~RING~~~RING~~~RING~~~RING..

"UGH!! Don't people know not to call at freakin" I glance at the clock. "12 pm-… oh nevermind. Eh, it's not ringing anymore anyway.." yawn "I'll just go back to bed then…"

~~RING~~~RING~~~

"OH MY GAWD!!!!!!!!!!" I yell and answer the freakin phone. I hear a rustling behind me and smile as I know it's Fang. " HELL---O?"

"Hello," I heard a lady on the other end with a heavy southern accent. " This is Kanon, from the FCPA, The First Child Protection Agency, I have got your results here that you sent in last week. "

????? So that what Fang was sending, and that's what I felt…. Oh.

"Okay?? Why are you calling me?" I asked. Fang was definatly up now. Ugh. " Is something wro-" Uh-Oh. "Wait a minute! The _First Child _Protection Agency??" I turned to Fang and mouthed the following words to him: Fang you are so freakin dead when I get off of this phone, if you thought I was pregnant, uh don't you think it's good to tell me. THE ONE YOU THINK IS PREGNANT!!!!! UGH!!!

"Uh, Max. You and Fang need to come to my office right away. Oh, and bring Iggy wit y'all. Smiley face "

"Smiley face??? WTF!?!?! What is wrong with you people!!!! Ugh. Be down there in a minute." I hung up the phone.

"Ohhh Fangy poo!!!!" I smirked. I walked over to him, who was cowering in his emo corner. He glanced up at me with fear filled eyes.

"yes….? " He answered.

"Hi… Get Iggy and you guys need to get you $$e$ in my car…… NOW!!!!" I screamed. Fang nodded and ran to get Iggy, who actually was at the bottom of the stairs….

Along with EVERYONE else… Gawd…

"Max whats happening?" Crap. Mom.

"uh…nothing…Can I bring Iggy and fag, I mean Fang out for awhile? " I asked sweetly.

"Sure, where?"

"Just for a ride."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~At the Agency~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"What do you want Kamen?" I asked

"Its Kanon." Eww I hate that accent. "Your results are positive. But the conditions are a little odd…"

"If it has wings I already know." I said.

"Yes, both do have wings bu-" She started

"BOTH???!?!?!??! As in two????" I practicaly screamed. Oh wait, I did scream it.

"Yes, two. One is Fang's and the other is Iggy's." …..I have no response to that.

"Okayyy… yeah uhmm awkward much??" Iggy stated.

"No-freakin-duh Iggy!!!!" Fang said. Then they started yelling at eachother like freaking banshee's!!!!!!

I rubbed my temples in the way only I can do to make people STFU!

It didn't work.

"Guys….." I said angrily. They still continued. "Guys….!" I said in my deathly voice. They still had the nerve to continue. I cracked. I pounced on the both of them, and when they were both pinned on the ground (One hand per idiot), and quiet I sighed. " Shut the Hell UP! Let's take this like adults."

Now, I stood up and turned to Ka--- whats her face.

"Now…. WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???!!!!???!!?!?!?!?!?" So much for taking it like adults.

**REVIEW IF YOU WANT MORE!! ~If you don't then to bad~ Jay be nice ~NO!!!~**


	2. Poor Iggy

**A/N**

**Heyyy its Jay on Ali's account! hehehehehe**

**Anyway....yea Disclaimer: Ali and I do not own Max Ride. If we did Fang would have awesome clothes (if you read the mangas you would figure out his outfits were horrible) **

Chapter 2

"Now....WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT??!?!?!?!?!!?!" So much for taking this like adults. Oh well.

"Well, you're having twins."

Ugh "Well I kinda figured that out by now."

"Yes well, you s-" She started.

"Wait. Why is there TWO guys here?" I interrupted.

"They are the fathers of course!" She said with that annoying-as-hell southern drawl of hers.

"Oh ok..."

"As I was sayin' the bo-" I, again, interrupted her.

"WAIT A MINUTE!!! BOTH OF THEM ARE THE FATHERS!!?!?!??!!!? HOW??" I screamed.

Fang and Iggy were staring at the ground. Maybe I shouldn't have asked.

"WELL IF YOU STOPED YOUR INTERUPTIN' I COULD TELL Y'ALL!" I guess I pissed her of.

"Ahem. YOU MUST BE SICK PEOPLE IF YOU DID IT AT THE SAME TIME!!! Ahem" What's with her and 'Ahem'ing? "One baby is Fang's and one is Igi's" The way she said Iggy made it sound like 'Igi' hehehe.

"Oh..well I'm leaving so if you guys want a ride back you're coming with me. NOW" I said to the guys.

They scrambled to an upright position (They weren't on the ground a minute ago..hmmm) and sprinted to the car. Jeez I didn't know they could run like that.

I followed them and threw Fang the keys. I can't drive now. I have a headache from the screaming. Ig sat in the passenger's seat and I sprawled out on the back seats. Rubbing my temples I stared at the roof of the car until we got back home.

That's when I realized. Mom. Oh crap. This is soooo not gonna end well.

Apparently Fang and Iggy realized to cause' their faces paled. (They are pale already so that is quiet the accomplishment)

Fang pulled in the driveway and shut off the car. We walked in and the WHOLE FLOCK, Ella, and -gulp- Mom were in the living room, their heads swiveled to stare at us. Fang and Iggy looked at me expectantly.

"Oh _HELL _no! You guys are telling her NOT me." I said.

Well If that didn't catch Mom's attention then nothing would.

'Oh crap' is DEFINATLY an understatement. I walked to the kitchen and got popcorn, sat on the sofa and watched.

"What happened?" Mom asked them. I smiled as Fang walked away, leaving Iggy alone to face my mother's wrath.

**A/N **

**Is it to short? Did I do good? Do you like it? Do you want more? TELL ME TELL ME TELL ME!! I think it's to short but I didn't have Ali's help on this one sooo yea.**

**Review or Jeb will turn you into a failure. =D hehehehe Ali's not here to tell me to be nice =D**


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